Thursday, December 29, 2011

I do not feel comfortable accepting gifts or compliments but I can dish them out pretty often.....

"According to mathematical theory, a single occurrence is of no statistical importance, a second occurrence might be merely a coincidence, but a third occurrence suggests and immutable law." Basics in Mathematics, Ludlow-Graham, 2009.

Here in Dixie land we have deep rooted beliefs that we really had no idea could be proven in the "educated world".  One that I have always remembered hearing growing up was deaths, or bad things happen in three.  My mother said it, my mamaw, aunts, all the women I knew and it seemed that once they said it you found yourself counting to see what would happen next to make this theory a truth.  As a mystic on a spiritual path I always have said that if I ask for "a message from the universe" regarding a question or something I need to pay attention too...if it happens or is said to me three times; well it is SPIRIT sending me a message. Sometimes I forget this principle but recently it has been re-brought up to my attention by me getting bumps on my head from NOT listening.

Making this more fun is the concept that in Paganism and in many spiritual paths deity is often presented in a triad form.  The Morrigan, (a Celtic Goddess deity) is a prime example of this for she is Danu the wild maiden, or Babd the fertile fiercely protective mother, and Macha the Crone destroyer, grim reaper of the dead. The Hindu take on this (I hope Allison has taught me well) is Kali the oldest of the triple Goddesses she can be Parvati the Creator, Durga the Preserver, and Uma the Destroyer.  In Rome you have the three fates Lachese, Clotho, Atropos, who dictate and handle the threads of life.  There are the Three Sirens, and the Three Graces known as Aglaia (Splendor), Euphrosyne (mirth), and Thalia (good Cheer).  Then lastly, I will bring in to play my three that I have learned Hathor the maiden, Isis the Mother and Sekhmet the Dark Goddess. Thus the Maiden, Mother, Crone triad has come to be a standard thing imbedded in our subconscious as holy, sacred, set-aside as special.

Of course we all know that God the Father, Jesus the Son, and The Holy Spirit (which many call mother) is present in Christianity. Just recently I learned about Eve, Sophia, and Lilith as a possible Gnostic female trinity.  So as you see almost all spirit paths (underneath a thick crispy batter of rituals, buildings, and human made rules) really hold dear the same concept that of a TRIAD.  Not three separate Gods or Goddesses, or three deities, but ONE as three.  Confirming what many in our heart know to be true...we cannot put our finger on something so large and label it for it like us is always changing and moving; and it seems from this perspective is also giving birth to itself constantly in new guises and forms.

Which brings me to the real point of this post, I received an email a few days ago that asked me the following...."Sonya, how do you know when you got an answer from your God or Goddess about a prayer, a conversation, a spell you did?"  I have always replied the same, never knowing the mathematical principle until later...when you get the same answer three times, or notice the same phrase or lesson reiterated to you three times, that is your answer.  THIS is your proof that your spell worked, that help is on its way, that you need to do this thing, that healing is inevitable, that yes the tough times are almost over, and as always your DIVINE is listening and assisting you constantly; all you need to do is ask. 

It is a funny thing, asking for something.  In our society it is seen as a weakness a way of admitting you do not know something, a humbling to where you bow and admit there is a intelligent energy out there with access to more information than you have within you but which can be the bridge to that outside of you that you need access to.   But, as you grow older or wiser you realize that the only way to learn and grow is to ask questions and listen. Thus what you once perceived as a weakness has become your greatest strength.  One of my spiritual teachers told me once, that until you are ready and willing and find yourself WORTHY of receiving all that the Universe has in store for you and you ask for it you cannot expect it to just GIVE it to you.  You have to ask.  You have to seek, and as we all know if you Ask you shall Receive.  If you knock then the door will open for you.

Next time, you hear three different people giving you the same advice that seem random to them but YOU know you have heard three times even if spread out in a two week period....Smile!  Laugh! Dance! Lay out an offering!  Say "Thank you God or Goddess".  Most people go a whole lifetime without knowing or seeing or hearing the voice of the God or Goddess on their ears, and you just did on the tongue of a stranger or friend.  What a miracle!

Just for this week take the time to ask for what you want, knowing you are worthy of it.  Ask a question you want to know the answer to, do not have a problem with stopping your life, or putting something on hold for a moment to ask for directions because you really have no idea how to get to your destination...then wait, listen, hear...and share with others the answer you received from your deity.

Thank you for the gift of your time, and as always Shine bright!

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Have a Holly Jolly YULE tide!

I had a hangover Monday.  I call it a hangover, because after festivals are over <especially the ones you help throw> you feel hung-over.  No, you do not have a headache…you are just exhausted and partially dehydrated.  Your brain feels like mush, your eyes are dry and you have no idea what you are saying for at least twenty four hours following one…but you are up and moving about since the world requires this of you.

Tuesday, I had festival withdrawal.  After three days and two nights of being spiritually and emotionally fed I was buzzing.  Things that were said, shared, and taught were swimming around in my mind; and they still are.  I was fed from Dagda’s cauldron, I had the privilege of walking with Brigid and sharing her sacred flame with a community I adore.  I got to stand in circle and dispense the sacraments of the Gods with my local hero Rev. Terry Riley!  I got to meet Tish Owens in person who is the reason why I wanted to throw a festival in the first place!  I overheard Rev. Edwina Rickman’s workshop and meditation; Rev. Allison Hancock blew us all away with her beautiful dark Goddess workshop…and right when I thought the weekend could get no better it did.

Main ritual….Rev. Amanda Riley and my husband Rev. Brian Miller did the “traditional Yule log ritual”  all of us thanked the Gods for one thing from the year before, and asked for some guidance in the coming year on an issue.  Every church there (all three) shared their traditions and there were no “rights” or “wrongs”, no criticisms, no drama.  I stood witness as Alfred Willowhawk and his wife Willow announced the addition of a fourth ATC church in the Midsouth and realized we, the Pagans are organizing and gathering together sharing our teachings and traditions like wildfire!  Everyone was high, everyone was happy, everyone sang, everyone had smiles on their faces and laughter in their hearts…and when you looked there were ten children in circle.  Our babies are worshipping along side of us!

I got to do a workshop with Rev. Amanda Riley on practical magick!  Have I ever told you that when I first entered this community I observed and partook in two workshops that she taught and at that time looked at her with awe in my eyes? (pssst I still do)  Several years later and there I stood next to her listening, still learning, but having the great honor of sharing a workshop with her!  Teaching about herbs, washes, oils, and their properties thrilled my heart and I could have went on for hours…but the people would have fallen to sleep by then :)

Children’s workshop with Rev. Allison Hancock she told an old folk tale and all the children gathered together under a blanket giggling and squirming, making animal noises, because sharing and community was the theme and it is fun to be a child.  Then the Befana tale was shared and Befana came out cackling and laughing hugging children and they were all amazed and bewildered!  Who was this Befana?  Of course the adults new it was Rev. Cindy Mcmullin but the children were convinced it could not be anyone they knew, especially Cindy, because they knew that she was in the kitchen!  Thus Befana must be real! 

Rev. Anita Christopher facilitated all the children’s activities to their delight! Cookies were made, snow globes constructed, stories were shared with our tribe (children in our laps), fairy ornaments put together and placed on the tree, the children had rituals…but most of all they bonded just as we the adults did together tromping in the woods, spending time at the lake.  YULE in our Pagan tribe is about the Children; but at the very last we adults acted like children fussing and laughing about gifts while playing Dirty Santa. Oh did I mention I got a Ganesha portrait out of the Dirty Santa game? Now he lives in my hall above a niche where I can feed him with incense and candles.

The time in between all of these rituals, workshops, and craft times was a different kind of spiritual broth.  The time you spend listening, and learning and gathering as your head spins and your ears pop and you know that you may never comprehend everything that was jammed into you in those thirty six hours but you cannot walk away without being filled to the brim.

Magick is addictive, constructive, liberating, and heady but the purpose to me of festivals is for a spirit-filled fix until the next time you hang and sing with that many people.  Thus while I am still digesting like a cow chewing its cud everything shared and told me this weekend, I feel a longing, in my heart, and in my soul. It feels like when I was first in love as a young maiden yearning for a lover (I am sure we all remember those days) that is only temporarily away, but you  know and are certain they are still in love with you and like you are yearning and longing for your merging together once more.  This is how it feels to me, when I part from such a large community gathering.

So until Daughters of the Moon I will yearn, long for, reach out, light candles for, talk to on the phone and face book my Pagan family. In the meantime, know that I am here and that even if we are not together; we shall never be apart… in my heart.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Well Color me Happy, and that means Purple to me!

The soul becomes dyed with the color of its thoughts. 
Marcus Aurelius
I love Color!  Well of course I do in the mundane world I work as a hairstylist who specializes in color!  Because of this I find that I pour a lot of meaning into how I implement color on my body.  I thought I would share this with you, because it is fun and makes me feel more confident and happy!  Any magick that makes one feel better  is something you need to share so here I go!

I wear makeup every day, and I find that when I think about it (now it is hardly ever thought about) I employ tricks to help me magically in my environment and for my own confidence.  Eye makeup has been used for thousands of years to convey messages to onlookers whether it be to let people know what culture you are from, or what goddess you worship.  In Egypt you knew what Goddess a woman or man worshipped based on how they wore their eye makeup!  Some days (since I worship Egyptian deities ) I dedicate my body to a certain deity I am working with or just feel like merging with that day…I talk to them while I am putting on my makeup and then say after I am done.  “May everyone who sees me today see you!  May your words be on my lips, May your hands be my hands.”

I also use the trick of color when it comes to eyeshadow.  To me whatever color I am using is the color people will see and thus…if I want to use all the “tricks in my magickal tool box” then correlating color magick with my makeup only makes sense.  I also use it when I wear lipstick, but understand I only either wear “colored eye makeup” or “colored lipstick” never the two together I feel that is very confusing to people and not clear enough for my intent…when it comes to beauty or color magick like anything else keeping it simple is effective. If you do not wear makeup (and may pagan women do not) you may wear nail polish and use the same tricks; I have found even the most dye hard natural witchling woman employing this magick time and time again.

So, here comes the fun part!  If you color your hair you can also use color magick to change the vibration and resonance around you to what you want to align yourself with.  I am going to explain this sentence because to me this is magick being explained in practical terms.  IF you want to convey passion and excitement dye your hair red!  If you want to convey high energy or have high energy then by all means dye it orange (people call this red but we all know it is not)!  Also keep in mind, that all colors have elemental associations behind them…thus when I color a clients head that I know is already brimming over with fire, and she wants a reddish color I always GROUND it by adding in browns and ashes to make it turn out more auburn, mahogany or burgundy…that way she does not come across as so “harsh”.  

If you know me at all though, you realize I color very nontraditional so I employ literally PURPLE this month, pink last month, green when I was starting a temple, orange after I had my son, Blue when I was doing women work, Red after the three month waiting period of having a child, and so on.  There, see my crazy color ideas do make sense don’t they?  

If you do not use hair color you can use head bands, barrettes, scarfs or hats of course most witchlings just employ the color they want to convey in the clothing that they wear; and that is more than fine too.  Below you will find a color chart that you can print out and use yourself every day and I hope you found this post fun because that is what it is meant to be…fun!

Try not to stress out during this YULE season, and remember COLOR is your friend! (PS if you get your hair colored PLEASE employ a professional they ingest love into your locks, scalp, and body!)
Color Associations and Symbolism

Signifies: Strength, health, vigor, lust, danger.
Holiday: Yule
Planet: Mars
Day: Tuesday
Astrological Sign: Scorpio

Signifies: Encouragement, adaptability, stimulation, attraction, plenty, kindness.
Holiday: Candlemas
Deities: Brigid
Planets: Sun, Mars, Mercury
Days: Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday
Astrological Sign: Leo, Sagittarius

Signifies: Knowledge, learning, concentration, persuasion, charm, confidence, jealousy, joy, comfort.
Planet: Mercury
Day: Wednesday
Astrological Sign: Gemini, Leo

Signifies: Finances, fertility, luck, success energy, charity, growth rejuvenation, ambition, counteract greed and jealousy, plants kingdom including herbal healing.
Planets: Venus, Mercury
Days: Friday, Wednesday
Holidays: Spring Equinox, Beltane
Astrological Sign: Taurus

Signifies: Tranquility, understanding, patience, health, truth, devotion, sincerity, honor, loyalty, peace, wisdom, protection during sleep, astral projection.
Planets: Moon, Venus, Saturn, Jupiter
Days: Monday, Friday, Saturday, Thursday
Astrological Sign: Libra, Sagittarius

Signifies: Power, piety, sanctity, sentimentality, tension, sadness amplification of other energies, wisdom, high ideals, spiritual protection and healing, psychic ability, protective energy.
Planet: Jupiter
Day: Thursday
Astrological Sign: Sagittarius

Signifies: Negation without reflecting, unlocking when stuck, banishing evil or negativity.
Holiday- Samhain
Planet- Saturn
Day - Saturday
Deities- The Crone
Astrological Sign: Scorpio & Capricorn

Signifies: Purity, consecration, meditation, divination, exorcism, the full moon, healing, peace, spiritual strength.
(May be substituted for any other color.)
Planet: Moon
Day: Monday
Astrological Sign: Cancer

Signifies: Balance, neutrality, used in erasing, canceling, neutralizing, and return to the universe without repercussion destructive energies.
Planet: Moon
Day: Monday
Deity: Athena
Astrological Sign: Virgo

Signifies: Healing, familial or emotional love (rather than sexual), friendship, affections, unselfish emotions, spiritual healing, banishing hatred.
Gem: Rose quartz
Planet: Venus
Day: Friday

Signifies: The Earth, grounding, trees, concentration, telepathy, spells to locate lost objects, protection of the familiars, pets, and animals.
Planets: Moon (tan browns), Venus (all), Saturn (dark browns)
Days: Monday, Friday, Saturday
Deity: Gaia
Astrological Sign: Capricorn
Holiday: Mabon

Signifies: Purity, the moon, treasure, values, female energy, the unconscious mind.
Day: Monday
Astrological Sign: Gemini
Deity: Artemis and other Moon Goddesses

Signifies: The sun, male energy, wealth, financial wisdom, conscious mind, attracting happiness, activity, intelligence.
Planet: Sun
Day: Sunday
Astrological Sign: Leo
Deity: Apollo and other Sun Gods

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Southerners did not invent simple pleasures, we just refined them!

TRUTH:  I have a recurring feeling  every night and have for as long as I can remember…when I lay down to go to sleep I feel the Goddess wrap her arms around me, and I feel her lightly brush my face in love.

 So where have I been, don’t I have a Blog to run or something?  I have been here fellow Southern Witchlings!  Here in Memphis, Tennessee plodding through the day to day things we all do.  I wash dishes, I do laundry, I mop floors (with special scents of course), I cook dinner, fix lunch; prepare breakfast, and all of Cayden’s snacks.  I tend to my little toddler Cayden who while not yet a year and a half has the attitude of a two-year old.  I sit still at times, and close my eyes and listen to the hum of the world as it spins, sings, and speaks to me.

Since the last time I have spoken to you all I had Thanksgiving at two homes, and assisted my husband do a new moon ritual for “career changes or a new job” spells.  I listened and learned as he shared with me and many others the history and stories of the Sumerian Gods and Goddesses.  I spent time talking to and calling “Ki” the Sumerian Earth Goddess and she fascinated me and enthralled me at the same time. I celebrated his birthday with the  Pagan Community he loves so much during his much loved "Meetup and Pagan Roundup" time where he shared thoughts on making things manifest.

I have had visitors drop in and out of our home; some to just talk and spend time with us, some in joy, some in sorrow, but it is all part of life.  I have had an eldest man-child finally finish an album he has worked on for over two years and see him go “hmmm”.  Of course, he did not like it that when I shared with him the title of the project “Tree of leaves and fire” sort of doomed it to take that long…yet ensured it Bigger success than he realized.  Then, I am a Mother, and I did change his diapers and stare into his big voluminous eyes for hours in fascination at the creation I saw swimming beneath his surface.

I have found out my husband has COPD, which has stopped him and I short and slowed us down a bit more…as if a baby had not done the job.  I have re-discovered emotions like Compassion, Understanding, Hope (which tends to peek its head out right when we are throwing our arms up to the universe in a giving up gesture).  I have come to understand that I have will power (duh I am a witch!) and I can stop smoking!  I have also learned this means that just because I can quit does not mean I should expect my partner to do it just as fast.

In a few weeks Temple books and new guidelines, and ways of doing things have stopped swirling about and started to take form; just like my baby who is now almost climbing over fences!  In a few weeks I have found myself loving my husband more openly, and being more soft and tender to people because now I understand like never before the fragility of life. In a few weeks, I have gotten excited about Yule found myself “dancing inside” when I think about seeing all my friends, and pagan family together for Winterfest.  In a few weeks, you do realize that in some TIME ZONE this could have been twenty years…but definitely more than two days.  

TRUTH:  When I am going through a really really tough or sad or scary time in my life.  I sit real still and close my eyes, and reach my arms up and imagine myself being picked up by my big Goddess Mommy and she scoops me up, and pats my back, and washes my face, and smooths my hair, and rocks me back and forth and tells me…"Everything is going to be all right, that she is here and will always be here; and that no one can hurt me while mommy is around."  You know, it always works!

What has happened in your two weeks? OH, and did I thank you all for hanging around and sharing the gift of your time?  THANK YOU

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

"Now that I am stuffed better lay me on the spit and turn me..."

Here in Memphis, where I live I know that when I go to my parent's house or my mother in laws house or my cousins homes in Mississippi, there are going to be a few staples that I should expect on the table for Thanksgiving.  I say this, because if you have ever been to another part of the country during this time (and I have been out east, north, and west) you will realize that Southern and Thanksgiving are customized for those of us that live here.  Now, I understand that soul food cooking can spice it up a bit making you expect pig knuckles and green into the mix; but other than those two things even the Soul kitchen witches down south pretty much offer the same spread.


* Roast turkey with Cornbread dressing that is in a pan
* Brown sugared ham with pineapples and cherries and cloves
* Some sort of vegetable casserole (usually squash, broccoli and rice, or green bean)
* Corn (I have never been to a Southern meal without it somewhere)
* Homeade pickles (sweet and sour)
* Cranberry sauce (jellied or homeade)
* Sweet Potato casserole with marshmallows on top
* A fruit salad concoction (Green goo, Orange marshmallow delight, or fruit cocktail with coconut)
* Pecan Pie
* Pumpkin pie or Sweet Potato pie (this depends on whether the Hostess likes Pumpkin)
* A Cake (usually Carrot Cake, or German Chocolate Cake maybe Orange Slice cake)
* Sweet Tea, Colas, and Rich Coffee

I am going to share with you some of my favorite recipes for this...because we all differ, I would love to have you email me some of yours!  I would love to post recipes from my readers...who knows?  Maybe we collectively could MAKE a Southern Fried Pagan Cookbook and donate part of the proceeds to a charity that means alot to us!


  • 1 cup light corn syrup or dark (I use dark)
  • 1 cup brown sugar
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1/3 cup melted butter
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • 3 large eggs, slightly beaten
  • 1 heaping cup pecan halves
  • 1 pie shell, unbaked, 9-inch
In a large bowl, combine corn syrup, brown sugar, salt, butter, and vanilla; mix well. Add slightly beaten eggs and blend well; stir in pecans. Pour into the unbaked pie shell. Bake in a preheated 350° oven for 45 minutes, or until set.



  • 6 cups grated carrots
  • 1 cup brown sugar
  • 1 cup raisins
  • 4 eggs
  • 1 1/2 cups white sugar
  • 1 cup vegetable oil
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 1 cup crushed pineapple, drained
  • 3 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 4 teaspoons ground cinnamon
  • 1 cup chopped walnuts


In a medium bowl, combine grated carrots and brown sugar. Set aside for 60 minutes, then stir in raisins. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease and flour two 10 inch cake pans.In a large bowl, beat eggs until light. Gradually beat in the white sugar, oil and vanilla. Stir in the pineapple. Combine the flour, baking soda, salt and cinnamon, stir into the wet mixture until absorbed. Finally stir in the carrot mixture and the walnuts. Pour evenly into the prepared pans.Bake for 45 to 50 minutes in the preheated oven, until cake tests done with a toothpick. Cool for 10 minutes before removing from pan. When completely cooled, frost with cream cheese frosting. 



3. Southern Cornbread Dressing


4 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves

1 (16 ounce) package dry corn bread mix 

1 (1 pound) loaf day-old white bread, torn into small pieces 

4 tablespoons margarine 

1/2 cup chopped onions 

1/2 cup chopped celery 

1 (10.75 ounce) can condensed cream of chicken soup 

1/8 teaspoon garlic powder 

2 teaspoons poultry seasoning 

1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper 

6 eggs


Place the chicken breast halves in a large saucepan with enough water to cover. Bring to a boil. Cook 1 hour, or until the meat is tender and easily shredded. Shred chicken and set aside. Reserve 4 to 6 cups of the remaining broth.
Prepare an 8x8 inch pan of cornbread according to package directions. Crumble the corn bread into a large bowl. Mix in the white bread.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
In a medium saucepan over medium heat, melt the margarine and stir in the onions and celery. Slowly cook, stirring occasionally, until tender.
Stir the onions and celery into the bread mixture. Mix in the chicken, 4 cups reserved broth, cream of chicken soup, garlic powder, poultry seasoning, pepper and eggs. Blend with a potato masher until the mixture is the consistency of gelatin. Use more of the reserved broth as necessary to attain desired consistency. Transfer to a 9x13 inch baking dish.
Bake in the preheated oven 30 minutes, or until golden brown. 

4. Baked Ham with Brown Sugar Glaze: 

  • 1 (5 pound) fully cooked sliced ham
  • 1/4 cup whole cloves
  • 1 cup pineapple juice
  • 1 cup brown sugar
  • 1/2 cup honey
  • 2 oranges, juiced


Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
Place the ham in a roasting pan and dot with cloves. In a saucepan combine the pineapple juice, brown sugar, honey and orange juice. Stir and simmer over medium-low heat until thickened, about 10 minutes. Pour the glaze over the ham.
Bake the ham uncovered for 1 hour in the preheated oven 

5.  Mamie's famous Fruit Salad (my mother in law)
  • 1 (20 ounce) can pineapple chunks, drained
  • 2 (11 ounce) cans mandarin oranges, drained
  • 1 (10 ounce) jar maraschino cherries, halved
  • 1 (16 ounce) package miniature marshmallows
  • 1 (16 ounce) container sour cream


  1. In a large bowl, combine the pineapple, oranges, cherries, marshmallows and sour cream together. Chill and serve.
Now this is not the whole she-bang these are just staples in my families, that when visitors start coming over to eat they ask for these recipes.  I have never given them out on such a large scale before...but why not?  Since I am a proclaimed Kitchen witch you might ask where is the magick?:  There is no greater magick than to SHARE food and what you love to do (I love to cook) with other people.  Sometimes, when my mother and mother in law (whom I know are really too old to cook) fix me food, I eat them just to injest their love and pride in their families.  That is why alot of us Southern women cook you know, because we have no other way of showing our kin folk how proud we are of them, and how much we truly love them.
Please, take the time to injest the love in the dishes you eat this year, think about how much time goes into preparation of a dish (typically twice the amount ) than in the cooking and consuming!  Know, that some woman or man who made this for you did it because they cared.  They may not care or love you in the way you wish they would; but you cannot choose the form of love or "force someone to love you" just be glad that you are.  

Have a fabulous family day, try not to argue too much, drink too much, hold too many grudges, take everything too seriously.  Let the religion prayers, the football talks, the "you should do this or that", your children are not as great as mine, being the black sheep (yep that is me), roll off your back.  Seize the bigger picture, understand that many of these people may not sit with you next year.  Just accept, share, receive, and give the love...and DO NOT skip dessert!

I love, and truly care for each and everyone of you! So thank you for reading and the gift of your time!  See you all next year!

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

" One two three, One two three, Step, shuffle, slide, Dance in the Dark with me!"

So it has been awhile.  My husband got bronchitis which developed into pneumonia, I got a severe cold and then the baby got the same.  Life decided to show me how I was not in control…at all.  Which is funny because at the time, it seemed like I was surfing the big wave of life, doing aerials, body curves, and not crashing; I was euphoric and mesmerized at my abilities to do things I had no idea I could do.  The water went still, there were no waves to ride.  I had to wait. I was not happy, I was frustrated and struggling with the new tempo of my life.

Now I have never claimed to be a patient person but as I have grown older I realize I am more patient than I seem.  However, I think the Gods were getting a big whooping laugh that made them roll on the floor to see me chomping at the bit for several weeks realizing physically I could not do what my mind “instructed me to do”.  

Sitting still, and not doing much of anything other than staring at pictures on a Television screen is almost meditative and very trance like.  It can bring to the surface all those things you were “on purpose” or “not on purpose” staying so busy for so that you did not have to deal with them.  I run and swim so fast in the stream of life that I can mark it in the following way.  Mamaw died when I was 30, two years later I finally admitted it, 3 years later I cried a lot, 8 years later I got peace with it.  WHY?  Because I made sure I stayed busy so as to “Not think, and Not feel, and Not have to deal with the truth of the matter.”  

However, my life does not work this way anymore I have no idea if it is the “instant manifesto Highpriestess thing” or if I have really just grown that much.  So out comes the issues I have not had time to deal with, and they were less than a year old…still hurting and I had to deal with them.  I am not saying I dealt with them the best way possible, like all of you I am still learning.  I am not perfect, nor do I know more than everyone, but I do listen, and work through things.  BTW in case you did not know, I am harder on me than anyone can ever be I do not give myself time to mourn, or feel sorry for myself, or to cry, or to even feel “loss or sorrow”.  I was not taught these things as a child, so as an adult I just kept on rolling….NOT.

This weekend I let “out” the feelings of loss and sorrow and betrayal and hurt I had felt several months earlier.  I let out the feelings of anger, and frustration.  I humbled myself and received back every inch of love and caring I had given to a person who “would not pee on me if I was on fire”; and I bounced back (btw they did not give it to me many others did).  I cried for about twenty four hours!  Yep, I cried  (something I never let myself do in public or private) and it felt good it was the damn being released; it was the balm of my soul; it was the arms of river goddesses telling me to let it go and flow and as it did I would realize it was just to feel this way and at the same time it was just an emotion.  Emotions are meant to be acknowledged, and to be expressed if you do not do either then they will come out in very strange ways.” That is what I heard, and what I saw, and what makes me smile.  

Big whoop I feel!  Big whoop I am not perfect!  Big whoop life is not always flowing and tossing and turning! Thank goodness it got still and placid for me to see the truth of what was going on inside and outside of me!  I had to strain out my well and get rid of the debris and yuckiness hanging about…I needed to be silly, and just let it all hang out.  I think I am getting amused at all the Dark Goddess offerings I am making lately; but I really am enjoying the wisdom and insight she is showing me…I know later on down the road these lessons will be pivotal.

“Thank you Dark Mother, for pointing out to me gently that I am too hard on me; that I need to take the time to feel and mourn and express my emotions and that does not make me a “drama queen” but absolutely perfectly your co-creation.  Thank you Dark Father for showing me that sometimes you have to sit still and do what ‘appears to be nothing’ so that ‘something powerful and beautiful’ can occur on the surface.”

How do you cope with being sick?  How do you cope with having to take care of so many others that are sick in your household?  How do you flow with the slow periods in your life when it feels you are dragging a tugboat of people and things and projects behind you?   Do you stay so busy all the time that you have trouble reacting to loss, sorrow, and feelings or emotions? When you sit still, and there is no sound, no pictures, only you breathing are you scared and try to direct your thoughts to what you “have to do” or are you open and do you listen to see what you “need to hear” not “what needs to be done by X day”?  These are the words of the Dark Moon, this is one of the mysteries revealed here.


1.  Find out when the dark moon cycle is. It is always BEFORE the new moon and is last period of your moon cycle. Research! Magick works with cycles not against them this is why you learn them and they are pivotal!

2.  Pick a deity to work with that is associated with a Dark moon or is a Crone or Sage deity (I am using THOTH this year, you do realize there are Gods associated with the Dark moon right? ) can use Persephone as a Dark Maiden one month and Sekhmet another month, and Khonsu another month...but make sure their personalities and attributes resonate with that moon.  Magick is a type of mathematics, the more you have in each column the more it adds up and the more likely you will get great results!

3. Use purple, grey, or black candles (Please take the time to look up what each color means, or think…what do these colors mean to me? For me Purple is dealing with deep psychic issues, grey with my shadow self, and black is for banishing) Research!  Colors have been proven even in psychology to affect your moods this is deep magick when you light those candles you are telling your psyche what it is working on!

4.  Use the appropriate incenses and herbs for your ritual (Hint: Black pepper, Sage, Damiana, possible Pine all will be welcome here).  RESEARCH!  Remember the more additions and bells and whistles you click off the more likely your magick spell will work as intended if you honor the Deity by doing research and presenting the proper herb for the spell "forgiveness" or "working with Hekate" you better believe they will take notice and respond!

4.  For offerings you can just use one night of the dark moon, but for any kind of magickal working utilizing EVERY day of the phase is the most effective.  On Dark moons I like to use all three nights, and I repeat what I did the nights before…and I am open to anything new I experience or receive. REMEMBER!  Magick is worship, it is also an exchange of energy. Magick is also practice.  How do you expect to get good at anything if you are not willing to do anything more than read about it?  You have to practice it, the more you practice the better you get...three nights in a row, now that packs a punch.  Seven nights?  Two weeks, now you are getting the picture the more you concentrate on one spell until you get a result the more focused and more likely you are to get your result!

5.  Realize that the Astrological phase of the Dark moon does have something to do with whatever issue you might want to learn about or work with,or are working through during a month.  Yep there is a Scorpio Crone Mother moon, and a Maiden Aquarius Dark Moon both have strengths both insights are pivotal to your new you emerging. KNOW WHICH one you are working with and plan your spell, God or Goddess, Candles, herbs, stones, etc accordingly.  Do not be the kind of person that thinks the Gods are just lucky you showed up with anything at all, respect the craft do the work and research and it will respect you!

6.  Are you scared of the shadow you see when the sun hits you? Are you scared of the concept of DARK vs LIGHT ?  Are you scared of what is really deep inside you beneath the surface?  “I love my shadow!  Isn’t she/he cool!”  These are things you should say when you notice your real shadow.  Dark Moon work happens whether you call on it or not.  Whether you seek it out or not…so it is best to mark it, acknowledge it and have fun with it. Dark Moon magick is essential to learning, evolving and growing, as a human being and spiritual practitioner it is not about hexes and curses.  Unless you call working on your own issues a "hex or curse".

So you have your candles, deities, salt, water, stones, herbs and you are sitting there in the dark after invoking your God or Goddess…now what?  Tell them the truth!  Tell them what you are going through, what REALLY happened, how you felt about it, how you feel about it now make sure you make the story as funny as possible or as sad as possible this is the time to really let that BIG emotions pour out.  Tell them you do not know what it all means, or how it is going to help you or etc.  Ask for their insights, thank them for showing you the “shadow of yourself”, thank them for everything warts and all…and remind them gently that you would like to learn these things about yourself in a gentle way, in a smooth as possible way.  If you have a piece of jewelry, a card, a physical object, a mantra you want to dedicate to this time this would be the time to do it with earth, air, fire, water.

Lay out an appropriate offering for your deity, take what you just learned and Burn it, Bury it, or Drown it.  It is that easy.

“Dark moon,
burning bright,
for those who have the blessed sight,
Accept my offering
Hear my prayer
Remind me that you are always there
nothing to fear
only to share
the truth. 

May I embrace you
my shadow
May I remember that without you
there is no light
May I seek out and maintain
a state of balance in my life
in myself
and in the world I live in.

Dark moon
shine bright!
Dark Moon
let me see your light!
Dark Moon
come dance with me
and reflect back to me
my light!”
-----------Sonya Miller

Monday, October 31, 2011

Laying out the dishes is great...but where is the cherry pie?

Sing the following to the tune of Merry Xmas the War is Over, by John Lennon and Yoko Ono

"So it's a another Samhain,
and what have you done?
 another year is over...
and a New one has just begun...."

When I was a little girl, I used to hear this song in the Kmart, Sears, and the mall playing while my mom was pushing me around in a cart to buy consumer products such as clothing, toys, decorations, etc.  For Pagans, Samhain is about as close as we get to the excitement of the "muggly world" of Christ mas.  Yes, I understand we have Yule, but let us be honest...we all try to out-do the previous year in decorations, rituals, parties, costumes, and just witchy greatness!

Many of us do ancestor rituals on Samhain, some of us do divination, some of us just hoot and holler around a bonfire, but all of us do something for Samhain.  What I worry about is that in all the hustle and bustle of Samhain (and I am one of the biggest celebrators I know of it) we forget about one of the true meanings of the Holy Day.  It is the end of one year, and the beginning of another.  Laying out food for your ancestors is wonderful, lighting a candle for them fabulous...but if we do not take the time to think about the previous year what we have learned and what we have gained, what we have lost, and what we need to change or carry over to the previous year...then we are doing nothing more than laying out food for dead people.

Now, let us think about this you not think our ancestors would want us to stop and take note of our accomplishments of the previous year?  Do you not think they would want us to plan for the coming year?  Part of honoring your ancestors is the idea of "thanking them for all they taught you, and for the sheer luck of your genetics, sometimes it is thanking people for teaching  you as in honoring leaders in your communities, or just people you really appreciated from afar that have crossed the veil; but I bet if you were to ask them flat spokenly what they would like you to know about the coming year...they would give you common sense advice.  That is what is beautiful about the gift of Magick that it is about as practical as it gets. 

We worship the Crone mother, and the God of the Underworld during Samhain, both Gods that will help us get through the coming winter by helping us provide and plan for our families and our communities.  Yes, you should thank them...but what about sharing your plan for the coming year with them?  What about asking them to look down the road of life and help you find the easiest and smoothest way to get to your destination?  You can do that you know, there are no Magick 101 laws you are breaking to ask for assistance or wisdom.  In fact, that is what the Gods are here for.

So with you, I am going to share the following:  I am very proud that our Temple has grown, prospered, flourished, and accomplished new things!  I have learned so many new things spiritually, mentally, and emotionally that in one more year I have grown more than I did in five before the Church.  However, let it be noted I have made "hasty judgements" done things "because they were easier" and "have tried to please everyone failing miserably" and all of these things I have honestly had to take accounting for.

I thank my Mamaw Minnie for raising me to see life as very practical and magick as common sense.  I thank my spiritual teachers for "cheering me on"  and giving me signs of encouragement when I needed it.  I thank my Goddess Isis for all I have, my children, my husband, my community and my friends.  I, however, have two goals I want to inch closer two by next year for me personally...first I want to return to school for hopefully the last time to secure a job and income I think I can retire with.  Secondly, I want to inch closer to that book I "keep on talking about" but have not "the confidence or willpower" to finish.

Now, that was not that hard was it?  Tonight after I take my new little boy Cayden out trick or treating with my fellow Pagan parents and visit his grandparents I will set a dish of food out.  I will light a candle, I will remember my ancestors though I must be honest I do every day...but I think the best way I will do this is by living my life in a way they will be proud, courageously, honestly, and upfront.

"May you have a Merry Samhain!

and a Happy New Year

Let's hope it's a good one.

Without any fear!"