Love. I typed in Love and Love poems in the Google search engine, and found a remarkable result. Most love poems are written about lost love, longing for love, regret and love, abusive love, or hot steamy sexy...but while that is a form of love; it was not what I was looking for or how I think of love. Do not get me wrong I know there are many kinds of love, and I was more interested in attraction, happiness, coupling, commitment love. These are all separate facets of love, and right here I want to state so are the others. For you cannot know what "good love" or "healthy love" is if you do not experience painful, angry, or unhealthy, love at some point in your life . But since this is my blog, and you are reading it I am going to say,.....HELLO, WAKE UP you write Your own blessed love story!
Yep, that is right. You write the lines, you pick the actors, and you choose whether your love will be a passionate drama where it ends tragically or whether it will be the kind where the two of you grow old together; for you truly are the DIRECTOR of your own life. As a Pagan this principle is re-inforced to us and in our workings time and time again. You draw to you what you are and you get back what you send out. If I am asked for a love spell, which only happens occasionally now, I always tell the person to write a note on the mirror that says "I LOVE YOU" and look themselves in the eyes while saying it. Then for them to stand and look at the feature they "dislike the most" about themselves (mine was my nose) and tell it how lovely it is. This is a long process until you can say "I love you to the top of your head to the bottom of your feet." Thus, in some way you are love spelling yourself.
This is crucially important for if you cannot love yourself, how in the world do you expect someone else to love you? How do you expect to know how to tell someone how to love you? How can someone else give to you, what you cannot find within yourself? (Yes, this is the gift of the Goddess) I do not mean "fake bravado" where people say "i love me" by posing duck bill faces or smooching the camera but REAL love, the kind that comes when you have "made a mistake" or "let yourself down" and yet you gently caress and tell yourself..."it is okay, no one is perfect". The kind of love that we are taught to receive from a God or a Goddess because for some reason it is so much easier (we think) to receive from a perfect something a perfect ideal. Yet, the irony being...they love you no matter what!
Yep, you heard me correctly the irony in all of this searching, working, yearning, panting, walking, reading, learning, is this truth....ISIS LOVES ME. She loved me before I knew her name, she loved me before I was a Highpriestess, she loved me before I was a Pagan, she loves me now when I am her Priestesss, she loves me when I am depressed, she loves me when I am sick, she does not care if I yell at her from time to time because she finds that amusing too! I do not have to be anything other than the creation I am for Isis to love me...but it is with this "aha" moment that I start to become transformed truly.
Granted, I will admit to you when I realized a Goddess like Isis chose me it made me want to change to be worthy of her love and admiration and trust. I found that like when I had my first child, and now my second, that for some reason I wanted to be the best Isis lover she had ever had. Thus, I started to study her, and talk to her, and give her offerings, write her poetry...court her. Then years later I worked to be share her with others in a positive light, and to give her credit for all I do, to lend her my body and spirit so that others see her through me; but technically I did not have to do any of these things for her to love me. HMMMMMM now how does that transform your idea of love?
A few weeks ago I really understood this, I had been processing it and chewing on it in my mind for quite some time. At some point I had stopped being "awed" that Isis had chosen me, or "amazed", I was so busy talking to her and listening to her, and walking with her, that I forgot how "awestruck and starstruck" I used to be. I was worried about this and then I heard her share the words "I love you, don't worry so much.".
I did not stop loving Isis, my relationship had just grown and developed into something lifelong; in a way I had come to "really understand and believe" she would be with me "no matter what". This made me think of how "un-perfect" I am; and how much more about myself I am striving to "fix"; but also made me see how much "better" I had become and how "proud" I was of some of my growth. Loving Isis had transformed me, or was it her loving me?
A mentor of mine once told me the irony of love is that it, like you, changes meaning as you grow. I realize now how wise she was. I love my children, I love my husband, I love my true very close friends, I love my God and Goddess, and my parents and siblings the love I have for them is so deep it cannot be tapped or located, it is underneath the ocean, thicker than a glacier, strong like the core of the earth, brighter than the sun, and receptive like the moon. It moves me like the tides to act and reciprocate, to do without thinking, to give without thought of receiving, to fill greater than my physical body and united with all the particles of my being in moments that are bigger than I could ever describe. This to me is love. It is no tragedy, it can be very comedic, but it is definitely not hurting, pain, bitterness or anger. It is not full of ultimatums or bullying, and does not expect perfection or place impossible standards or burdens upon you...it lightens your load.
It is said, that when you ask for something the Universe heard you and you must be open to receiving and reply" I am open, I am ready Universe!" and get out of your "own damn way" to receive that manna from the heavens. To me, I could not really receive love until I understood what it was, got out of my own way and let it transform me and guide me.
What do you consider love? How do you write your "love story"? Do you look at the people around you and realize that you drew them to you by "sending out" your love for yourself? This week, think about love, decide what that means to you, what it feels like, how you want people to express it to you, and "love yourself more" when you flub up.
Thank you for the gift of your time, and remember YOU are perfectly loved, and perfect love!
Yep, that is right. You write the lines, you pick the actors, and you choose whether your love will be a passionate drama where it ends tragically or whether it will be the kind where the two of you grow old together; for you truly are the DIRECTOR of your own life. As a Pagan this principle is re-inforced to us and in our workings time and time again. You draw to you what you are and you get back what you send out. If I am asked for a love spell, which only happens occasionally now, I always tell the person to write a note on the mirror that says "I LOVE YOU" and look themselves in the eyes while saying it. Then for them to stand and look at the feature they "dislike the most" about themselves (mine was my nose) and tell it how lovely it is. This is a long process until you can say "I love you to the top of your head to the bottom of your feet." Thus, in some way you are love spelling yourself.
This is crucially important for if you cannot love yourself, how in the world do you expect someone else to love you? How do you expect to know how to tell someone how to love you? How can someone else give to you, what you cannot find within yourself? (Yes, this is the gift of the Goddess) I do not mean "fake bravado" where people say "i love me" by posing duck bill faces or smooching the camera but REAL love, the kind that comes when you have "made a mistake" or "let yourself down" and yet you gently caress and tell yourself..."it is okay, no one is perfect". The kind of love that we are taught to receive from a God or a Goddess because for some reason it is so much easier (we think) to receive from a perfect something a perfect ideal. Yet, the irony being...they love you no matter what!
Yep, you heard me correctly the irony in all of this searching, working, yearning, panting, walking, reading, learning, is this truth....ISIS LOVES ME. She loved me before I knew her name, she loved me before I was a Highpriestess, she loved me before I was a Pagan, she loves me now when I am her Priestesss, she loves me when I am depressed, she loves me when I am sick, she does not care if I yell at her from time to time because she finds that amusing too! I do not have to be anything other than the creation I am for Isis to love me...but it is with this "aha" moment that I start to become transformed truly.
Granted, I will admit to you when I realized a Goddess like Isis chose me it made me want to change to be worthy of her love and admiration and trust. I found that like when I had my first child, and now my second, that for some reason I wanted to be the best Isis lover she had ever had. Thus, I started to study her, and talk to her, and give her offerings, write her poetry...court her. Then years later I worked to be share her with others in a positive light, and to give her credit for all I do, to lend her my body and spirit so that others see her through me; but technically I did not have to do any of these things for her to love me. HMMMMMM now how does that transform your idea of love?
A few weeks ago I really understood this, I had been processing it and chewing on it in my mind for quite some time. At some point I had stopped being "awed" that Isis had chosen me, or "amazed", I was so busy talking to her and listening to her, and walking with her, that I forgot how "awestruck and starstruck" I used to be. I was worried about this and then I heard her share the words "I love you, don't worry so much.".
I did not stop loving Isis, my relationship had just grown and developed into something lifelong; in a way I had come to "really understand and believe" she would be with me "no matter what". This made me think of how "un-perfect" I am; and how much more about myself I am striving to "fix"; but also made me see how much "better" I had become and how "proud" I was of some of my growth. Loving Isis had transformed me, or was it her loving me?
A mentor of mine once told me the irony of love is that it, like you, changes meaning as you grow. I realize now how wise she was. I love my children, I love my husband, I love my true very close friends, I love my God and Goddess, and my parents and siblings the love I have for them is so deep it cannot be tapped or located, it is underneath the ocean, thicker than a glacier, strong like the core of the earth, brighter than the sun, and receptive like the moon. It moves me like the tides to act and reciprocate, to do without thinking, to give without thought of receiving, to fill greater than my physical body and united with all the particles of my being in moments that are bigger than I could ever describe. This to me is love. It is no tragedy, it can be very comedic, but it is definitely not hurting, pain, bitterness or anger. It is not full of ultimatums or bullying, and does not expect perfection or place impossible standards or burdens upon you...it lightens your load.
It is said, that when you ask for something the Universe heard you and you must be open to receiving and reply" I am open, I am ready Universe!" and get out of your "own damn way" to receive that manna from the heavens. To me, I could not really receive love until I understood what it was, got out of my own way and let it transform me and guide me.
What do you consider love? How do you write your "love story"? Do you look at the people around you and realize that you drew them to you by "sending out" your love for yourself? This week, think about love, decide what that means to you, what it feels like, how you want people to express it to you, and "love yourself more" when you flub up.
Thank you for the gift of your time, and remember YOU are perfectly loved, and perfect love!
This is the love I have for Being Pagan, being a Witch, being a Healer.... For Jesus, the human man, who has taught me that love MUST be unconditional to whomever you offer it, or DON'T offer it. Kwan Yin and the Magdalene are my Mothers and Boudicca is my Warrior soul/self. Thank you for this Blog woman, you are Top Shelf! :) xoxo Kay
ReplyDeleteThank you for reading...I feel you are the same, and I love how you see all the faces and facets of the God and Goddess and are open to it all!
ReplyDeleteWow! I am returning to my path after detouring for several years and I must admit, after all the books, meditation, candle burning,etc...I now get it!! I kept looking for some hidden truth or meaning to "why I was chosen". I was chosen to love. Period. Thank you blog woman for adding a little more clarity to my own insight into myself and all of the wonderful and magikal spirits that encompass me and the world as I see it and love it.
ReplyDelete