"And the future is so bright I gotta wear SHADES..."

So the past two weeks have been a whirlwind.  Yes, Air has been present in my life….”"Who can tell the mind of the Wind? Who can catch it and hold in their hand? Who can tell where the Wind has been blowing? And who among the wise can foretell where it will go?"

As an Egyptian priestess and Air Sun sign I revel in Air its speed and invisibility it delights me filling me with spirit; but now that I have returned to my “real world” and “real time”.  I can look back, and see how important grounding is also.  The ATC (Aquarian Tabernacle Church) Arch priestess Belladonna and her Highpriest Dusty came into our stomping grounds and shared two festivals with me and our communities.  I had the fortunate experience of having them dwell in my home for a few days; teaching me, laughing with me, and loving me.  The time went fast, but the moments are imprinted indelibly on my life.

First we went to the Southern Delta Church of Wicca-ATC May Day festival.  It’s theme was “Getting Back to our Roots” and the week was full of communities getting to know each other better, re-establishing connections, sharing our dreams, learning and laughing from one another, loving each others children’s, playing games, utilizing warrior energy, and listening to Rev. Terry Riley and Rev. Amanda Riley as they reminded us how far we had come and where our community had come from.  It was warm, it was happy, it was home…how nice to be grounded and rooted in such rich red clay soil.  Apple Oaks, Southern Delta Wicca, White Oak Raven, Temple of the Sacred Gift, Temple of the Stone (all ATC) and Summerland Grove and Temple of the Ancient Ones were all present, and working together peacefully and lovingly for the community.  Today we have this many churches, and organized Pagan communities just five years ago we had two.

What happened to make all this growth?  Why so many organizations in such a short amount of time?  Well in this area we have grown that much!  As more and more people declare their spiritual paths pagan the need has arisen for us to offer them services, counseling, rites of passages, workshops, and celebrations that correspond with our Spiritual traditions.  Traditions have been handed down, the younger generation grew up, and so it is the wheel turns and those who taught us have either crossed over or asked us to step up and so we have.  The future does not look dismal here in the Bible Belt for us Pagans it looks bright as the sun, especially after the Temple of the Sacred Gift-ATC opened its new Temple building (that is not in a home anymore) to the public!

Next, we went on to the Pagan Unity Festival, which is put together every year by Tish Owen a well known local pagan/witch/healer/psychic/published author.  The guest speakers were five star caliber:  Belladonna Leveau, Christopher Penzack, Oberon Zell, Dorothy Morrison, Raven Grimassi, and more more more!  The workshops were stellar on everything from Tarot spreads, numerology, how to make oils, candles, ritual workshops, drum workshops.  The music was out the roof with the Tuatha de Danna and Wendy Rule!  Handfastings were numerous, with Tish Owens in her NO spare time still overseeing and conducting them, the vendors top notch, and the spirit was one where all had gathered together for community and there were NO strangers amongst us…for we have come full circle and realize we are really really not alone in these parts!

I am not a camper, I prefer hotels and linen sheets to bunks and dirty floors but all of this was tossed aside to dance, and sing, and be part of rituals, do magick, learn from masters, listen to great songs, and just become part of something so much bigger than just me…SPIRIT.

If you have ever wanted to go to a Pagan festival and never gone…you should.  If you have ever gone and did not like it…maybe you should try again.  The future of our Path is growing so fast, and broad, and strong!  Catch the Air!  Let the Fire warm you!  Drink in that Water!  Feel the Earth beneath your feet!  Join with kindred spirits and shed “you” and become a “we” just for a weekend.  It is nice to remember ever now and again that there is a tapestry being woven and you are a thread in that beautiful creation.

If I met you this weekend thank you for the gift of your time!  If I did not meet you these past two weeks then I hope I met you soon!  Special thanks to Southern Delta Wicca and Tish Owens and BOTH festival staffs for pulling together and off a most fabulous Festival occasion that I will never forget!  VERY very Very Special Thankyous go to my fellow pathwalkers Bella and Dusty and Wiccan Seminary.edu! My cup runneth over…please receive a sip!

Have a Holly Jolly YULE tide!

I had a hangover Monday.  I call it a hangover, because after festivals are over <especially the ones you help throw> you feel hung-over.  No, you do not have a headache…you are just exhausted and partially dehydrated.  Your brain feels like mush, your eyes are dry and you have no idea what you are saying for at least twenty four hours following one…but you are up and moving about since the world requires this of you.

Tuesday, I had festival withdrawal.  After three days and two nights of being spiritually and emotionally fed I was buzzing.  Things that were said, shared, and taught were swimming around in my mind; and they still are.  I was fed from Dagda’s cauldron, I had the privilege of walking with Brigid and sharing her sacred flame with a community I adore.  I got to stand in circle and dispense the sacraments of the Gods with my local hero Rev. Terry Riley!  I got to meet Tish Owens in person who is the reason why I wanted to throw a festival in the first place!  I overheard Rev. Edwina Rickman’s workshop and meditation; Rev. Allison Hancock blew us all away with her beautiful dark Goddess workshop…and right when I thought the weekend could get no better it did.

Main ritual….Rev. Amanda Riley and my husband Rev. Brian Miller did the “traditional Yule log ritual”  all of us thanked the Gods for one thing from the year before, and asked for some guidance in the coming year on an issue.  Every church there (all three) shared their traditions and there were no “rights” or “wrongs”, no criticisms, no drama.  I stood witness as Alfred Willowhawk and his wife Willow announced the addition of a fourth ATC church in the Midsouth and realized we, the Pagans are organizing and gathering together sharing our teachings and traditions like wildfire!  Everyone was high, everyone was happy, everyone sang, everyone had smiles on their faces and laughter in their hearts…and when you looked there were ten children in circle.  Our babies are worshipping along side of us!

I got to do a workshop with Rev. Amanda Riley on practical magick!  Have I ever told you that when I first entered this community I observed and partook in two workshops that she taught and at that time looked at her with awe in my eyes? (pssst I still do)  Several years later and there I stood next to her listening, still learning, but having the great honor of sharing a workshop with her!  Teaching about herbs, washes, oils, and their properties thrilled my heart and I could have went on for hours…but the people would have fallen to sleep by then :)

Children’s workshop with Rev. Allison Hancock she told an old folk tale and all the children gathered together under a blanket giggling and squirming, making animal noises, because sharing and community was the theme and it is fun to be a child.  Then the Befana tale was shared and Befana came out cackling and laughing hugging children and they were all amazed and bewildered!  Who was this Befana?  Of course the adults new it was Rev. Cindy Mcmullin but the children were convinced it could not be anyone they knew, especially Cindy, because they knew that she was in the kitchen!  Thus Befana must be real! 

Rev. Anita Christopher facilitated all the children’s activities to their delight! Cookies were made, snow globes constructed, stories were shared with our tribe (children in our laps), fairy ornaments put together and placed on the tree, the children had rituals…but most of all they bonded just as we the adults did together tromping in the woods, spending time at the lake.  YULE in our Pagan tribe is about the Children; but at the very last we adults acted like children fussing and laughing about gifts while playing Dirty Santa. Oh did I mention I got a Ganesha portrait out of the Dirty Santa game? Now he lives in my hall above a niche where I can feed him with incense and candles.

The time in between all of these rituals, workshops, and craft times was a different kind of spiritual broth.  The time you spend listening, and learning and gathering as your head spins and your ears pop and you know that you may never comprehend everything that was jammed into you in those thirty six hours but you cannot walk away without being filled to the brim.

Magick is addictive, constructive, liberating, and heady but the purpose to me of festivals is for a spirit-filled fix until the next time you hang and sing with that many people.  Thus while I am still digesting like a cow chewing its cud everything shared and told me this weekend, I feel a longing, in my heart, and in my soul. It feels like when I was first in love as a young maiden yearning for a lover (I am sure we all remember those days) that is only temporarily away, but you  know and are certain they are still in love with you and like you are yearning and longing for your merging together once more.  This is how it feels to me, when I part from such a large community gathering.

So until Daughters of the Moon I will yearn, long for, reach out, light candles for, talk to on the phone and face book my Pagan family. In the meantime, know that I am here and that even if we are not together; we shall never be apart… in my heart.

We are all Fair to middling today, fair to middling.

Southern Pagan Etiquette:

I don’t have a clue as to what the etiquette in your areas are; but I do know what are some of the rules of etiquette around these parts.  So I thought I would share them with you all, mostly because the Pagan community is growing very rapidly.  With more and more new and eager fresh hearts and faces coming in it cannot be expected that they just “know” how things are done. The irony here is that most of these rules were passed down verbally and in small covens that branched out, hived, joined, combed and then became the present community we live in here today. 

When I say I am only telling you how it is in the Midsouth what I literally mean is Tennessee, Mississippi and Arkansas now I understand that in the Eastern parts of Tennessee there is a whole ‘nother set of Cumberland region rules I am not query to.  I do keep in mind a lot of us here came from people (myself included) who moved to these areas from those red crusty mountainous regions.  They carried with them their poultices, remedies, songs, spells, quilts, and traditions.    I am not trying to preach to anyone; or get a point across to a particular person I am just being the “Miss Manners” of these here parts and sharing with you all some general “ways of being” so that you understand how we do things; and what is expected here. 

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1. Never go to another person’s circle and touch their altar.  You can look at it, but do not touch it.  It is considered rude.  In fact, many witches or groups do not want you to step in their circle BEFORE the ritual because they just cleansed it.  So no matter how curious you are; wait until after the ritual and then ask the facilitator of the ritual if you can look or touch.

2. Never go to another Pagan/Witch/Wiccan’s house and see their personal altar and touch their things.  It is okay to ask the owner about the altar, but unless you ask for permission and are given it…do not touch.  Only observe.

3. If you go to an event and are introduced to an Elder or Highpriest or Highpriestess be respectful.  This means in actions, words, and deeds, for this is the way of acknowledging their time and effort given to the community you are just starting to sniff around. You do not have to fill their coffee cups every time it is empty, but it is nice!  When greeting them bow your head slightly, and if they are sitting and you are standing either crouch down to their level or bend your knees so that you are lower than them.  Why?  This is body language respect and they are the matriarch or patriarch of that group you think you might want to be part of.

4. Never ever go to an Elder or Highpriest or High priestesses house for counseling or PERSONAL lessons and not bring them a gift.  If it is something special like you find out they like such as boysenberry pie then you score extra points!  If they are a shaman it is highly likely tobacco is considered a standard gift.  It is disrespectful of the spirit and the person for you to expect they give and give and give to you, and you do not acknowledge their gifts. The job of an Elder or Highpriest/ess is not to SERVE you; it is for a reciprocal relationship with spirit they open doors and hand you keys.  They aren’t a Gas Station folks!

5. It is considered bad form to go to a circle at another person’s circle or home and for you to immediately ask that they move their circle to your home.  You just met them!  You have not taken in what they do, you have not thanked them for the gift of their time, the energy they gave you for the ritual, or even the food they laid out and fed you.  ALWAYS thank your host, but do not start out asking them for what they can do for you and telling them how they should move their circle and all their work to your convenient location.  It is their circle, they built it up from ground zero RESPECT that.

6. Do not judge people you just met!  First impressions are hardly enough ground for you to tell enough about a group, its members, or its Clergy/Highpriestess/Highpriest for you to know what they are about.  You should take the time to go to the rituals at least three times before getting a “feel for them”.  DO though ask their experience if you are thinking of joining you really don’t want to join a group that has a leader who just “DUBBED” themselves leader do you?  See if they have roots, and people in the community that is respected that would recommend them.  Checking recommendations is not a bad thing. 

7. You see those people standing next to you in circle? They are a lot like you!  They too are scared, and shy, and awkward feeling.  They have just made a BIG step!  They decided to take a risk and gamble and try to practice their faith with other people.  Respect that, be nice, be friendly, make friends…but do not try to use those people to “stir up the cauldron” or to “start your own group”.  We all drink from the same well of the Goddess.  If you want to start your own group, that’s cool do it!  However, going into other people’s circles with the intent of farming for a group of your own only starts “bad feelings” in a community. Try to remember that everything is done with a “group” in mind not just for “you” the individual and yet for “you” the individual. There is a community bigger than you out there; please be gentle with it.

8. That circle you are connected too is part of a larger community!  That Highpriest and Highpriestess they know all the other Highpriest’s and Highpriestesses in the area and most if not all the Elders.  Keep in mind, that once you burn bridges in one circle…it will follow you.  It is inevitable.

9. If you feel that the circle you are in is doing something “unethical” well I can understand why you would leave.  However, do not post it on Facebook or Twitter go to the people involved and sit down and talk to them about it.  You might come to understand that your viewpoint on the situation was skewed; or maybe you will see that your ethics and theirs do not congeal but it is never ever okay to be cruel, slander, or try to tear apart a person.  It is totally against the ethics of our path. Leave gently, and find the right group for you! b

10. Never ever go to a circle drunk, or stoned or even on prescription medicine that alters your state of consciousness.  Do not go to circles bringing alcohol or firearms.  Most of these people running public circles are doing all they can to keep it open, and that means they have to keep the law.  Would you go to a church of another denomination and bring beer or guns or dope?  No, so why would you expect your church (and that is what a circle is) to let you do that and turn their head? Remember that, a circle is a church …your church so act that way. 

11.  A lot of groups offer training programs, and have Highpriestesses or Elders or Clergy that teach.  These classes cost money out of the facilitator’s pocket.  These classes take time, out of the teacher’s world.  These people felt CALLED to teach you.  They have years and years of experience (usually ten or more) and they have learned things they want to share with you to make your path easier.  However, they are not going to spoon feed you.  They are not “at your beck and call” they have lives also.  Did you know that they all work jobs, and have families, and relationships, and children or grandchildren of their own?  It is okay to ask them questions regarding your class homework (and please if you take a class do the homework) and the day to day lessons else you are wasting your time.  It is okay to go to them for counseling if you have personal issues. 

It is not okay for you to expect them to just wave a wand, and you be where they are at (it is more insulting to them personally and your spiritual path than anything).  In fact, it is impossible!  YOU have to put in the years and years of training (and I do not mean two) and constant practice.  YOU should listen to them because while they do not know everything they do have your best interest at heart and you might be surprised to see how much they worry for you and pray for you, and think about you while putting together that lesson plan and trying to find a way to connect and reach you so that they can make your path easier.  Teaching is a calling and not all can do it.  So be nice, give them a break, and be realistic.  You are not going to be a Highpriestess tomorrow (unless you cheat and give yourself the title) but remember this is a path that is steeped with traditions, you are taught them, you pick the ones that work with you, and you hand them down.  That is why they call it a PATH and why there is one. Someone, allot of someone's, walked it before you got there.

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“To those who went before me and taught me…I thank you.  To those who come behind me, and I share my energy with, I pray I make your path’s easier.”

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Now I am sure you all can think of other rules of etiquette that if you are outsider coming in to your area that people ought to know.  I have not written up clergy or Highpriest and Highpriestess “codes of conduct” yet; but trust me I am going to share a few because I think they are important and I like to know rules and “ways of doing things” in other parts.  These are not “social pagan festival rules” I know you all understand that festivals are a whole different kind of hunting dog.  

I also want you all to know I have been new to a few areas.  I have stepped on toes unintentionally and have learned from mistakes and years of experience some of these things I am sharing with you.  In fact, I have to go into other people's circles and areas all the time; and I try to mentally remind myself to observe respectfully.  To be quite and see their way of doing things and if you know me that is HARD for me to do.  Etiquette is different for every circle, every grove, every coven, every church but GENERAL rules they don't change and what does it hurt to be more respectful than necessary?  It might just help you make a new friend or get an ally or two.!

PLEASE post below and share some rules you can think of you see people breaking in their eagerness to join and please state it gently, let us be nice, for what good does it do to harm another?

 Lastly, but most importantly, thank you for the gift of your time!

We are all Brothers of the Sun and Daughers of the Moon!

In my neck of the woods, in my circle of friends who are Pagan that are scattered across the United States the hottest “topic” of debate was usually the role of males in Paganism.  It would make women irritable, because they felt they were defending Goddess and had come to the religion in the first place so that they could be more “empowered”.  Me, and my girlfriends felt that in the “real” workplace/political world we were “not listened too” and treated as “less than” and that if you really wanted to insult a man you called him “a girl" (or vaginistic type words a few months ago I saw this used by advertisers on a billboard to get men to buy a sportscar).  My male friends, however, would argue that the world had changed to the point where they could hardly get jobs and that the world we described was not”real” or “had leveled out” leaving them competing against minorities for everything; they did not feel that they should have that same “bias” in their religious choices.  So there was a gridlock…since the Highpriestess is what runs covens (unless you are involved in an organization that still venerates male over female) and since Goddess books there are aplenty and God books few my male Pagan friends felt they got the short end of the stick.

For years, when I was younger I would think," If you all feel this way then why come to this religion if you resent women running it?  Go somewhere else, any other religion will let you run everything if you are male and not even let females become ministers!"  However, the wheel turned and  I started to hear with spirit filled ears, and listen with a spirit filled heart and realize that maybe just maybe they (my male friends and even my young son) had a few valid points.  So, when I returned to Memphis once again I started to listen and the same points came up.  Males saw all the women rituals that excluded them, the Goddess retreats and felt that they had nothing equivalent.  They were being asked to participate and be “better” men than most of society but were not being treated “fairly”.  When questions of rites of passage for men came up they were told they were “not important” and that “why should they need them?”.  Some leaders of the organizations went as far as to say that the “separation of the two sexes” was silly anyway, and that it promoted more problems than solutions.  Yet, everywhere I listened I heard them hurt and hungry for something more and  “just for them” they wanted to also leave behind a legacy of "new Pagan men".

As a woman I understand the need for “just for me”.  I read Virginia Wolf’s “A Room of One’s Own” while in college and firmly decided from that point on in life I would make a space and time for just me because it was important.  Goddess devotional books, and companion readers emphasize over and over again how important it is for women who give so liberally to husbands, parents, children, and their bosses to make a space and time for themselves.  So women started forming little groups, or girl nights out, or pampering sessions, by now I have not met a woman my age who does not have a “just me” hobby, activity, or time that helps her get back in touch with her inner Goddess.  This is wonderful, it is liberating, it is empowering, it was not heard of in my Mamaw’s day and time unless you were rich!

But what about men who take care of their children, wives, bosses, friends, and families?  The numbers are growing on how many men raise children alone and how are young men going to learn how to be comfortable and not defensive being a "man" (and no that is not a bad word) if they do not have role models, and mentors, and become more open minded?  What if you do not think the perfect time to spend with men is in a Budweiser commercial at the Drag races? I know this is an extreme example but here in the south it is quite common…what if you like to read poetry, and play music, and paint, or just meditate and contemplate the universe?  Where do we encourage this in our modern day society?  Why is it okay for the woman to get in touch with her inner maiden with “hello kitty” houseshoes but the man cannot get in touch with his inner “rogue” playing video games or buying star wars collectibles? 

I say this because you get a group of women together and more often than not you will hear references to men…just being more immature than women.  That men, waste money on toys and don’t seem to care about childrearing like we do.  It is like we women, force men into a role that they themselves might not want to be pushed into.  If women do not like to be “cookie cuttered” then why is it okay for us to force “traditional” roles on men?  I realize that in my marriage, I have to stop and re-acquaint myself with my gentle father- husband all the time because I have pre-conceived stereotypes that were fed to me by my parents and society that told me Brian has to be XYZ.  However, he is not those things.  To add to this, I have a compassionate soft spoken artistic twenty year old son who has expressed himself through clothing and words since he could articulate his mind.  His ambiguity when it comes to sexual roles worried me at first, only to find me expanding and realizing that sexual roles are just that ”costumes” and that one size does not fit all.

Did you know that I do not hear my baby Cayden cry in the middle of the night?  My husband does, and no he does not wake me up to take care of him he gets up cuddles and swaddles his son and rocks him back to sleep.  Did you know that he has taken Cayden to the doctor alone more than me because if he does this I have time to color my hair and do my nails?  He does that so I have ME time.  Now, you can say that means I am a “less than mom” and he is a “better than dad” but I will argue with you we are doing what works for us as people and as a family unit.  We have gotten to the point where doing what we are, is more important than what others think.  My husband really has longed for a Pagan Men’s retreat for a long time now.  Last year, he finally got a “fathering ritual” at the age of forty. He has two other children from a previous marriage, one twenty one the other twenty two and he has been a practicing pagan and a Highpriest for at least twenty years. That is took him that long to get this rite of passage I found dumbfounding and sad.

This weekend, he and my oldest son are going to a Pagan Men’s retreat called Brothers of the Sun < http://templeofthesacredgift.org/bots/info.html>  our church , Temple of the Sacred Gift-ATC is co-sponsoring it with the only Pagan’s we knew in the area that celebrated the Male aspect of Paganism as much as the Female aspect, Southern Delta Church of Wicca-ATC.  Rev. Terry Michael Riley has since 1993 been a legal ordained minister of the Pagan community with a Church.  He fought for the rights of Pagans and it was documented in the March for Ft. God video < http://www.amazon.com/March-Robin-Anderson-Cuhulain-Terry/dp/B00023DEH6/ref=sr_1_2?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1313519927&sr=1-2 >.  He is a pioneer and courageous in ways I can only hope to become and yet for several years now in the woods he has continued to have a small men’s mysteries retreat.

Two years ago, when I met Rev. Terry Riley he told me he had a manuscript lying around that he had not gotten published but rejected everywhere he turned, and that he was ready to give up on since no one seemed interested.  I asked him the topic, and he told me men’s mysteries and the relationship of Men to the God and the Goddess energies.  I could not believe that he had such an important book tucked away and that no one wanted to publish it!  So I asked him to look at it and edit it and I would study on how to get it published, I knew in my bones it was important and like everyone I know I love helping people.  I formed a self publishing company (Heka House), took my income tax refund and published the book named aptly BROTHERS OF THE SUN: THE PAGAN MEN”S MYSTERIES (hey it is a great book you should read it and purchase it for every male pagan you know!).  We (Terry, Brian and I) felt the book was integral to the future of Paganism and addressed a common complaint that was never addressed and always ignored.  I have never been prouder than to help assist a person publish something I feel was important.  I have never felt more amazed to realize that with helping fund a Men’s Pagan retreat in a nice facility that we are starting a rock solid tradition we can leave behind to future generations.

If we, the women, do not back our men then who will?  Is the consort not just as important as the Goddess?  You bet he is!  I pray that this Brother of the Sun retreat will help heal some of the wounds caused in this community by not treating our the male energy as "equal to" not "greater than" the female energy.  I pray that it starts a legacy that teaches and instructs our men on how to be better at being themselves.  I hope that it helps each of them find a part of themselves they forgot about, that they make new friends and come home exhausted yet refreshed.  Do I believe I finally listened to the universe?  You bet you I did!  Will I ever truly understand what the men in the Pagan community are expressing…maybe not, but I am taking a baby step in the right direction.  That is all I know how to do, and I pray my Brothers give me a break and know I wish them the best! But if you are a male Pagan, and all you do is complain about the differences and do nothing to support a local festival and movement to help your own, then do not complain...hush up.  You cannot complain about the President of the United States if you do not vote!

How do you all feel about the men learning how to be more comfortable being themselves and finding themselves?  How pivotal do you feel this is to men and future men in our Pagan communities?